Killer Roster, dude

Ever wonder where Michael Myers would bat in a lineup? Where Freddy Kreuger's bladed-mitt would be best in the field? Where Chucky or Norman Bates would play? And who would coach this rag-tag bunch of misfits?

Look no further than this link, with my latest article for the McSweeney's folks.

Thanks, everyone. Hope none of you blew your thumbs off lighting illegal fireworks as a way to set off car alarms and celebrate America's birth simultaneously.